No One Told Me There'd Be Math

So hey, I was throwing numbers around like they meant something mathematical on Monday Sept. 16th. I don't even know what day it is, let alone how to do math. "Word problem' has an entirely different meaning today. The problem is - words are a problem. Pain is ridiculous, medications are plentiful but side effects suck. Everyone says it gets better. They better be right. Because I need to know the name of that damn bus driver. I think I got off at the wrong stop and he needs a talking to.

Unmasked Dancing Queen

I have stopped taking Omega-3 supplements as of two weeks ago. I stopped taking Advil almost one week ago. Now that that has had some time to take effect, I can really feel the pain. More of what I do aggravates my hip. But I soldier on because it's what I do. I push myself. What I can push myself to do is becoming less than it was. But again, I push. Why? because next week the doc is going to break my pelvis and fix it. Very little I am doing between now and then will change anything.

What I have done however, is dance in the aisles.  We went to our friend's birthday party at a huge concert that played nothing but Abba music.  There was wine a plenty, and that was after the champagne toast. I toasted three times. I may not be able to take anti-inflammatories, but I sure do know how to dull the aches and pains.  Once that had set in I was dancing and having a great time! I knew I'd pay for it the next day, and I did. But it was so worth it. I read another blog where someone talked about the 'last time they'd do _____ ' prior to surgery. I didn't even realize I had started to do that, but I have. That didn't stop me from being a dancing queen that night. And it probably won't once I recover.

Alternative Sit Ups

Today Larry had me working on exercises that I could feel along the side of my belly, and in my core. It felt good to do them. Some even felt easy. THEN, he asked me to curl my wrists in while pulling a rope attached to weight machine. I knew it was too good to be true. Instead of being able to pull the rope all the way down for 15 reps, as I had been only seconds before, I was now only able to do about eight reps.  And. It. Hurt.

Damn, now I have to put a quarter in the 'I Can't' jar.

The good news is, all these exercises feel exactly like doing sit ups, except they are infinitely easier. Well, most of them are. I can feel them in my obliques (the muscles along the side) and the solar plexus and lower abdomen. And boy howdy, these are FAR more preferable than the traditional sit ups (which are bad for you by the way) with which you may all be familiar. You know the ones, the 1970s 3rd grade gym class kind that have bad gym outfits to go along with the wanna-be militaristic gym teacher who thinks they can 'straighten out' these little whipper snappers. Wait, are we still talking about sit ups?? Why yes, Virginia, there is a real sit up. But no, Virginia, you no longer have to do them. It's a good thing too. Because  this article leads with 'Consult your doctor' as the number one step to doing sit ups.

So, just see Trainer Larry and he'll fix you right up with a much more difficult version. But you can wear whatever you want. And he doesn't bark.

Bonuses

There are plenty of good days, where my hip hurts but it's tolerable. After my Rookie Move day, this week has been tough. Sunday I played soccer with the kids with wild abandon. Ok, not wild. Ok, and not with abandon. But with energy and disregard for my hip. The result has been a less than pleasant week. I just wanted to throw in the towel and stay in bed. 

Monday I could barely walk. Tuesday I couldn't work out with my legs, so trainer Larry put me through the paces with my arms. Feel the burn. Wednesday I pushed it pretty hard on the elliptical (I had to burn off the extra peanut butter I ate Tuesday night in self solace). Today, I was finally able to do a bit more. I popped my left hip (the good side) back in last night. Great, now I am worried that I have dysplasia on that side too. Truth be told, I've been worried about that since I first had pain back in 2009. It was in my left hip first, then mysteriously disappeared. All along otherwise it's been my right hip. 

Once it popped back in I felt a lot better, albeit with some pain. I got a small elliptical work out in before my training session, and ended up walking my son to school to register for kindergarten. A long, slow walk in the hot summer sun was just the thing to . . . 

a) burn bonus calories?

2) get a tan? 

d) require a heating pad, an ice pack and a muscle relaxer? 

** bonus points for you if you get the sequencing movie reference **

Anyway, in the midst of this it hurts/it doesn't hurt week, I received in the mail an amazing item from a fellow PAO/hip sister. She was kind enough to send me a couple of extras of the bracelet she created as her personal mantra. The acronym is very fitting, and I was grateful to receive it. What I am also grateful for is the community of hip sisters that is available 24/7 via the internet. Many of the people on the lists and groups have already endured surgery and recovery. Yet they remain on the lists as wonderful resources for those of trying to sort through diagnoses, 2nd, 2rd, 4th and more opinions, and surgical choices. To that end, persevering and overcoming seems a more likely bonus heading into this weekend, rather than throwing the towel anywhere but in the laundry.

Rookie Move

rook·ie   (rk)

n.

1. Slang

a. An untrained or inexperienced recruit, as in the army or police.

b. An inexperienced person; a novice.

2. Sports A first-year player, especially in a professional sport.

---

[Perhaps alteration of recruit.]

* * * *

This whole dysplasia thing is bizarre. One day I have pain, the next, very little. So after a few days of lessening pain, I woke up to a virtually pain free day yesterday. So what did I do? Play soccer with the family. Rookie move. It was just some kicking around on a field. But after five minutes, I started to ache a little. Ever the 'tough minded' one, I kept going, even drop kicking a few balls and running a bit.

Big. Mistake.

Today, my good side feels worse than my affected side. I literally almost had my husband run out to the drug store for a cane. I can barely stand on that side. Great too because that's the side I sleep on when my affected side hurts too much at night. Well done new kid. Well done.

So Hip it Hurts

This doesn't work.

This helps, temporarily.

One minute I'm scowling and grunting as I do the exercises Larry instructs me to do. The next minute I'm limping. One day I'm on the elliptical, burning calories away (I hope), then next minute I cannot find a comfortable way to sit, stand or sleep.

I push myself harder on most everything I do. So it's no surprise to me that I do that at the gym. I've been focusing on the 'game day' (surgery) and trying to meet goals. Like losing weight (not happening). Like getting stronger (I'm getting more sore). But I know crutches are looming ahead, and I really have no idea how the pain level will be. I have heard recovery from this surgery is horrible. but it is short-lived. So I have that going for me.

This machine like it will chew me up for breakfast.
Fortunately the exercise was to pull away from it.  

I'm in Paining

I may have overdone it. I'll see tomorrow. We went away this weekend, sans children, and did a lot of




. . .  Walking. Walking people!!! Get your mind out of the gutter,

I have been going easy on what I do for exercise the past few months. My a$$ can attest to that, but I can no longer turn around enough to see it well. Blessing and a curse. Anyway, I have been taking Advil very sparingly, though I have taken it in regular and strong quantities for at least five years now. Now that the surgery date is looming getting closer, somewhere in my once-upon-a-time-passed-for-athletic-mind came the notion of training for the recovery pain.

Me: Let me get this straight. You want to stop taking anything that helps even mildly relieve this 24/7 pain now?
OUaTPFAM: Yes.
Me: you're out of your mind.
OUaTPFAM: No, actually I'm in yours.
Me: Ha ha, very funny.  Oh crap, it's true.

Ok, so now I'm having conversations in my head with myself. If you're enjoying this, I can assure you it will only get more amusing when I am actually taking medication in recovery. Plus, I'll be way bored.

I sometimes think that if I'm not in enough pain it doesn't justify the surgery. But that's just crazy. I don't want to hurt myself by pushing my activity level too far. It just doesn't always seem like its real. The plan is this - I'm in pain whether I work out or not. So I figure I'll work out. I walked myself silly this weekend and now I hurt more. But I'm still going to the gym tomorrow. What? Because my OUaTPFAM self wants to know how much pain I can handle before I cry 'uncle'. I want to be as strong as I can be physically going into surgery. But I also don't want to leave out the most important part of training: mental preparation. So I'm in training for the pain. 

No Pain . . . No Pain.

Pain.

I didn't realize what was happening with my hip and my body. I wonder how many of us ever really do. Until there is pain. For me as a lifelong athletic person, I was accustomed to pushing through the pain, often at an cost. From age 11 when I discovered figure skating I was so committed to what I was doing that I never gave pain a second thought. Unless it was really bad. Define really bad? Unable to walk. I don't think I was ever there more than a couple of time as a teen and as an adult.

Fast forward to this year. After I gave birth to triplets five and a half years ago (THAT certainly messed with my hips), I went back to skating, thinking that would be the path to weight loss and happy ever athletic forever. I competed seven times between 2009 and 2013, with increasing hip, back and neck pain. I successfully lost weight in intervals, gained back some, but managed to maintain. I went to the gym to supplement. But then . . .  something tore. Something tore physically, which was much more than my daily mind losing schedule of managing triplets, two with special needs.

The day of my last competition I was practicing at 7am. I had a good plan of stretching prior to skating these days, careful to make sure I didn't over do anything. My husband had pointed out that sometimes discipline means holding back. So instead of attacking my skating the way I had always done, I took off the 'all business' face and patiently stretched and enjoyed what I was doing. All zen and stuff. Uh huh. It was actually pretty nice. So there I was, practicing, five hours before my event. I went up into a jump, and when I landed, it felt like an arrow doused in searing flames had been shot into my right hip. I crumbled to the ice, unable to walk. Somehow I got off the ice, and someone got my shoes for me. I hobbled over to the PT and she stretched me out and gave me directions to the local ER. I seriously considered going, but decided instead to eat Advil, take a bath and a nap in my hotel room and compete. I convinced myself that I could 'dumb down' my jumps and make it through, which I did. I even placed third. But I knew that would be my last skate for awhile, which is probably why I made myself do it.

Since that time, I have had several X-rays, an Arthrogram and an MRI. I have consulted no less than four doctors nationwide. I full expected to be told I had a tear, and it could be repaired by arthroscopy. What I hear instead was, "You have dysplasia". Huh??

Determining a dysplasia diagnosis
A normal center edge angle for a hip joint is 25 degrees. Mine is 15.

Apparently dysplasia and labral tears are very common in figure skaters and dancers. Yay for what I love taking me down.

Options:

1) Arthroscopy - this will repair the torn labrum, but likely destabilize my hip due to the underlying
issue, dysplasia. Could also cause rapid inset arthritis.

2) THR (Total Hip Replacement) - unnecessary for me as I have good bone, cartilage and joint space, and no visible arthritis.

3) Do nothing - will most certainly worsen my existing issues of pain and mobility, also possibly cause arthritis, though not as quickly as arthroscopy.

4) PAO ( Peri-Acetabular Osteotomy) - This is a preservation surgery, which allows me to keep all my bones and parts. However, it involves detaching the hip socket from the pelvis, and repositioning it correctly over the femur (thigh bone).


At first it was all surreal. I have had one major surgery, a c-section, and two broken toes. Very healthy, only stayed in the hospital on bed rest during pregnancy.

This surgery is going to require a six week near total bed rest before I am even ALLOWED to begin PT. Then 3-4 months of crutch/walker/cane dependency while I learn to balance on my newly situated anatomy. Anxious? You bet. But you know what they say . . . no pain, no pain. This is going to be painful. It better be worth it.